Feelings Against Reality

it isn't because i couldn't let go of you.
it isn't because i'm expecting for more.
these feelings appear once in a while,
and when they do i try to hide them,
but i always end up exposing them indirectly, unintentionally.
It doesn't ruin the moment,
or maybe we're just good in not giving a damn about it.
It feels like it may explode anytime,
but i always try the very best for it to not go out of control,
at least not where you'll get to see it.
These feelings are no where welcome anymore, not even to myself.
i treasured them, i tried using this reason to keep them.
They kept coming back, its not me.
I ended up wanting to keep them.
but just til there.
i don''t want it to get any deeper, because you'd think i'm stuck on you.
i don't want it to get exposed, because i don't like the idea of it.
I did my best to show you that its okay if you don't feel the same
because we don't want this back anymore, WE.
but it just doesn't work that way
So stop taking one step away from me, i won't go any closer.
Stop taking any step further, because i couldn't control these feelings, it wont help.
it won't hurt me if you don't feel the same.
I'm trying my best too. i also wish these feelings would stop.
i also wish one day, i can look at you once again and not feel anything.
its been years, and it's still not that easy.
but i'm trying ...
Just stay where you are, i wont get any closer.


Road For Joy (c) 2017
don't get me wrong, i'm no longer holding on.

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