Road For Joy

it isn't because i couldn't let go of you. it isn't because i'm expecting for more. these feelings appear once in a while, and when they do i try to hide them, but i always end up exposing them indirectly, unintentionally. It doesn't ruin the moment, or maybe we're just good in not giving a damn about it. It feels like it may explode anytime, but i always try the very best for it to not go out of control, at least not where you'll get to see it. These feelings are no where welcome anymore, not even to myself. i treasured them, i tried using this reason to keep them. They kept coming back, its not me. I ended up wanting to keep them. but just til there. i don''t want it to get any deeper, because you'd think i'm stuck on you. i don't want it to get exposed, because i don't like the idea of it. I did my best to show you that its okay if you don't feel the same because we don't want this back anymore, WE. but i...

On a day where feelings return. On a place where we suddenly reminisce. I'd smile through the happy moments Learn from the times i was hurt. I probably won't love less, nor would i choose to hurt others " it has always been you" sounds a bit too absurb but not false. These feelings that i don't know if they had disappeared then returned, or has always been there just hidden. I don't hate it, i don't wish to forget them. But they are also feelings i could no longer tell the world. How do i handle the feelings i'm not suppose to expose? How can i keep these feelings without having to burden the other half. Do i tell you tell once again that i love you? one last time, so maybe I would get tired of saying it. for the last time, so, maybe i'd stop expecting for the last time, so maybe it'll be enough so i will no longer need you beside me. for the last time, so maybe i will no longer care. Can i tell you i love you ...

Roses are Red Violets are Blue While i'm enjoying the color black on this day, i hope she have a colorful day with not just red roses and teddy bears but to enjoy a bouquet of chicken like any other girl would. To show more efforts than what she'd usually do, to appreciate you more than she normally do To thank you for everything you did. to sacrifice a little of her pride to surprise you to love you more and will always do. Roses are Red  Violets are blue, i sincerely wish for you the best What i'm going to say is the most fed up thing for today But,  Happy Valentines day to you. Road for joy (c) 2017 04/02/2017 Happy Black Day. :D

" Do you miss him ? .. "  No, i don't .. til you suddenly asked me. Now i do. i miss that it irritates me. i miss him that i wish i could just give him a calll i miss him that i wish it takes just one call to see him again. " Do you still love him? .. " No, i dont, .. til you suddenly asked me . Now i'm aware that i still do.. i love him and i wish he knew.. i love him that i want to tell the whole world. i love him.. enough  to hate myself. "Do you want him back?..." No, i dont... actually, i do.. But it seems so complicated to do so. But it seems so risky and i'm not willing to risk anything. But it seem too impossible because it already hurt me once. i want him back, that it annoys me  But i don't want to lose him any more. "Won't you have any regret? " i already do. Road For Joy (c) 2017 I loved you , I still love you , and I think I'll always do.

Unrequited in love. Lost in life. How mean could destiny be toward me? How do i know i'm at the right path to where i should be? How do i tell him how i feel without losing him? Months passed.. our hearts still confused. You were near yet so far.. And i continue to take one step away from you. And finally, i'm used to this painful feeling every time i remember you. A love that was almost there.. A Love that was too good to be true. A  Love with no words being said  and feelings being unknown. A Love that ended before it was given the chance to start. Months passed.. our hearts still hasn't healed. It aches my heart to not have you around.. It aches my heart that i can't get closer when you are around.. Eventually, You'll learn to stop yourself from falling.. But sometimes its just too strong it'll just ruin you. The End has arrived . Its wasn't what we wanted, but it just happened Destiny was never on our side. Every Treasured memorie...

I thought you'd be annoying. i thought you'd be a nuisance. i'd never thought you'd be important. i'd never thought i'd feel scared to love all over again. It started out as a joke. It started out like any other love story. It started out with being friends. and slowly hints starts to show up. Could he seriously be falling? or maybe its just an imagination. Are we really saying these as lame jokes? or is there some sincerity as they are being said. Will i be running away again  from something that could be the best thing in my life? Will i avoid the cliff again or stay at the edge knowing someone would catch me down there? Will i be alright if i let myself fall despite the risk of getting hurt? Will you leave me if i stay on the safe side? Will i lose you if this story end? Will i be able to handle another wound on my own when you disappear? I get lonely, because they tend to leave. I get annoyed, because they don't seem to understand. I...

i like you.. i'm not sure why .. it's not like you were always close by in fact you were no where near ever. i like you.. For the little things you unintentionally do.. the simple sweet gestures which gives me butterflies.. the lame jokes that i wish was true. the serious side of yours that doesn't last long i like you.. it started out with a little interest and a little curiosity .. I didn't have the chance to get to know you well but from a distance, i started to like you.